Hello “Bloggers” & “Bloggets” (a little yin-yang for the techno crowd). Thank you so much for stopping by today. This request came from a college freshman at NCSU recently. I want to share his e-mail with you.
This reader writes:
Dear Mrs. Hampton,
My name is _______ and I live in Raleigh NC. I will be freshmen at North Carolina State University in the fall. I am truly inspired by you and all that you have accomplished. I recently found out more about you and your amazing career in an article that I read in the News & Observer. My career goals as of now are to either become a dentist, osteopathic physician, or earn a Ph.D. in Health Administration and Health Policy and possibly become a health care executive/college professor.
I basically have two questions.
1. Even though I intend on going into the field of medicine instead of real estate, can you give me any advice on pursuing one’s dreams and being successful personally, professionally, and financially.
2. My goal is to someday buy a house in the older part of Raleigh (somewhere around St. Mary’s Street or around the Carolina Country Club). I know that this probably sounds silly, but what advice can you give me so that I can one day own one of those beautiful homes?
Thanks for your time Mrs. Hampton! I really do appreciate it.
Thank you so much for your e-mail. Your first question asks for advice on pursuing one’s dreams. From where I sit – you seem to be beginning at a much higher place than I personally began in my pursuit of the same. But where you “begin” makes no guarantee as to where you will “end”. So here’s my advice to make your dreams a reality.
First have dreams – BIG ONES. We must attempt great things and expect great things. Sounds like you’ve on the right track with this. Next– ADVANCE CONFIDENTLY TOWARD YOUR GOAL(S). You might try getting a little more “specific” along the way. Your target sounds a little “wide”.
You asked – so I’m going to give you the best I’ve got to help you make it happen. You must MAKE A DECISION on your exact goal and stick with it. In order to make a decision this important, you might want to get away, spend some time alone and decide what you “really, really want” to narrow your sites. (No this is not the Spice Girls song – more like Glenn Fry of the Eagles crooning “Soul Searching”- before your time, I’m sure, but a great fit here.)
Now that you’ve made a firm, specific decision of your exact goal – prepare to fail. If you don’t fail – your goal is likely not big enough. If you don’t fail – you are not stretching enough. Lastly, if you don’t fail – you’ll never have any interesting “war” stories to tell. There is a great book called “Failing Forward” by Maxwell. Bottom line, your tolerance and your entire attitude about failing has to drastically change from “mainstream” thought on the subject. You know how college and older “kids” in their 40’s and 50’s can be. You’ve got to have the right car, the right clothes, the right house, the right spouse – it goes on and on. When you start thinking more about what others think – you are on the wrong track.
Everything out there from TV and music, points you to what society has created as “success”. Don’t fall for their sales pitch. Decide what success means to YOU and you alone – then go after it with all you’ve got.
You also ask about succeeding financially. Actually, if you follow this outline: have a dream – advance confidently towards your dream, get very specific, learn to “fail forward”, I believe you will likely have financial success. How much do you have to have to consider yourself successful financially? That could change from age 19 to 39 so think big. But do remember that financial success alone is a hollow victory, a harsh master and will leave you worse than an addict looking for a fix if that’s all you want.
The last part of your first question is even more interesting to me. You’ve asked how to be successful “personally”. Again, I am impressed with your candor. Being successful personally has nothing to do with being successful financially. To me being successful personally has everything to do with your character and the over used word of integrity. Let me see if I can put it into “19” year old speak here. To find integrity, I recommend you:
1. Figure out what you believe about God – seek and ye shall find – and nothing else you will ever do will be as important as finding your personal path to your Creator.
2. Don’t follow the trends – set them.
3. Don’t ever consider yourself perfect, but become very comfortable with YOU…
4. Figure out how to “give” rather than horde. You have a gift – gifts are for giving.
5. Learn to do the right thing – when everything in you wants to take a short cut – don’t do it – take the hard way and feel the power of going against every emotional whim.
6. Spend time alone often. Some people never get comfortable alone. Don’t spend your whole life in the “noise” of the cosmos. Find your power & potential in quietness.
I will answer your second question tomorrow. It’s actually about real estate inside the beltline!!! Again, thank you for e-mailing me. I enjoyed hearing from you and I know my readers did as well. You sound like a terrific young man and I’m glad you are out there.
Please come back soon. God Bless.